Free Water, Anyone?


I observed what I find to be a bizarre phenomenon at the Edmonds Classic Car Show this past weekend. This is the second event we’ve participated in this summer where we have a booth and offer chair massage, gift certificates, raffle tickets, etc. As per usual, we also handed out free samples of Biofreeze, especially at the beginning and end of the event when things were slow. What generally happens when one of us asks a passing stranger, “Would you like a sample of Biofreeze, a natural anti-inflammatory?” is one of four things. The person responds:

1. “Oh, wow, that is great stuff! Can I have two?” Then they keep going.

2. “Uh, I don’t know. Does it really work?” We assure them that it does (duh, no, we give out useless crap for fun), so they accept it, eye it suspiciously and keep going.

3. “No, I don’t want it/don’t want to carry it (’cause, boy, it is heavy)/don’t have any aches or pains (yeah, right)/etc.” Then they keep going.

4. They say nothing at all and either refuse to make eye contact or stare at us as if we had two heads and just offered them tickets to a nude freak show.

I find responses 2-4 odd. It’s not like there’s a catch to accepting a free sample of Biofreeze. It does have our name and number printed on the front so that they know how to locate more, but other than that . . .

Now at the end of the event, we had a lot of leftover bottled water, which we normally only give to those people who buy a chair massage. So instead of hauling it all back to our office, we gave it away, as a gesture of goodwill. And it is amazing to see how differently people behave if you first offer them a free bottle of water, as opposed to a free sample of Biofreeze. They smile and make eye contact and offer amazed thanks. At that point, they will not only happily accept a free sample of Biofreeze, they will ask how it works, they will ask about massage, they will ask for our cards . . . all because of a little bottle of free water. “Unbelievable,” I said to my partner. “that something about being the giver of free liquid refreshment makes you immediately a Person to Be Trusted, while offering a free packet of anti-inflammatory gets you worse looks than a dope dealer offering dime bags to preschoolers.”

I highly recommend, therefore, free water as a sort of quasi-marketing tool for encouraging folks to get massage. Unless your event is sponsored by Coca Cola, and Coke is selling water. That’s a possible assasination offense, but also another story . . .

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